Showing posts with label Young Adult Fiction. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Young Adult Fiction. Show all posts

Saturday, December 16, 2017

A Reading of Book 1 of the SDS

Here is a quick one...a while back, I submitted the first chapter of my book, "Sweet Dreams: Searching for Roy Buchanan" to the Wildsound Festival in Canada.

Here is a reading of Chapter 1:




How about that?

One of the things I've been looking for, for quite some time, are actors or others to "read" the characters as they might see them in their own minds. That presentation has always been of interest to me, and I recently have been talking with theatrical friends about that possibility.

It's down the road, but worth looking at.

Does this make you want to read it? I hope so.

The Sweet Dreams Series is a multi-volume work that I began in 2007. Here is the Wildsound link that tells you about the story, and a bit about me:

https://novelwritingfestival.com/2017/12/16/novel-reading-of-sweet-dreams-searching-for-roy-buchanan-by-tory-gates/

Now I am still pushing and promoting my latest, "Live from the Cafe," on Brown Posey Press. BPP will do the SDS next year, and we'll be working up till then on this.

I got a really nice bit of validation yesterday from someone who knows what's what in theater. I gave the pitch, and explained this idea...

"You have quite a universe going on there," or something like that.

That's kinda cool. I have to really expand it, though. So much more to do.

Anyway, I thought Rachel did a very nice job on the read...I like hearing different voices, and it intrigues me to hear how others interpret the work.

Anyway, I don't know if I'm going to be back before X-day, but either way, have a good one.

Peace, Out.

Saturday, February 11, 2017

The Other Roads Club, Reconsidered

Well, here's a look at an old manuscript...I began writing "The Other Roads Club" trilogy back in 2008 or '09...after a number of years of edits, and fooling around with it, I realize it's got a long way to go. But I wanted to play around with it again...it stands up pretty well. I can see where my style has changed over the years. I wonder what you think...this is the introduction from Book 1, "Take Another Road." Let's meet a new/old heroine, Aimi, and her interesting friends...

Chapter 1--Letters, and the Golden Pair
Dear Kira-chan: I have only a short time before breakfast, so I must make this note a quick one. I was up late into the night reading The Bonesetter’s Daughter. Amy Tan is a wondrous writer; the story was at times sad, but one that really made you think. I will see if I can find more of her stories in the library.
So yes, I still read a great deal. It helps in these days, but I am well, and I hope you are the same. I miss you very much, yet each day I do my best to move forward.
Kaz will be meeting up with Kaldera today, and I just might get to meet this other boy who has been taking lessons from him. Kaz says he is very different, but someone he’s sure I’d like. He too likes to read and is very much into the western classics.
Mother is calling me; I must go. I love you, Kira-chan, as always…Aimi.
Aimi Okuda set her writing aside and cast a brief glance at the framed photograph that looked down from the top shelf of her desk. Smoothing back her long black hair, she turned and stood before the mirror above the dresser. Aimi clipped two metal barrettes in place, adjusted the collar and matching blue neck ribbon of her school uniform and the waist of the short, pleated skirt; she then made sure the level of her blue legwarmers matched at the knees. Aimi then picked up her book bag and stepped out the sliding door into the narrow hallway.
Moving past her parents’ bedroom, Aimi looked out into the front of her home. To her right was the small, threadbare living room. To her left in the kitchen, a woman had just finished packing lunches for the family.
“Good morning, Mom,” Aimi said as she slid past the breakfast table behind her mother.
“Good morning.” Madoka returned her daughter’s greeting and closed the three wooden bento boxes before setting them on the counter next to the stove. “Aimi,” she asked, “would you shout down the basement to your father? Breakfast is ready, and we’ve got to leave soon.”
“Okay.” Footsteps clumped up the steps now, so Aimi took her place at the low table. Tucking her long pigtail securely inside her red morning robe, Madoka sat beside her daughter, and the two began to serve three plates of rice rolled in seaweed, setting them beside small bowls of soy sauce, along with last night’s leftover baked fish.
“Here I am, no need to yell for me.” Aimi’s father, Goro squeezed himself through the tiny door that led to the cellar and slid it shut behind him. Dressed in blue jeans and a dark blue work shirt, he entered the kitchen and sat down across from his wife. Goro was in his early forties, short but strongly built. He ran his hand through his black hair, which had a few grey streaks in it and picked up his coffee cup. “The new flutes are packed and ready,” he said before taking a sip of the black brew. “They should go over well today.”
The Okuda family owned and operated a small shop in the Ameyoko section of Tokyo. The area was once the source of black market goods following World War II, but had since evolved into a colorful, bustling place of business. Their shop specialized in traditional and modern Japanese artwork. The more popular items were prints of certain scenes the tourists favored, but Goro’s handmade flutes or shakuhachi were popular, as were Madoka’s calligraphy paintings.
As the three began to eat, Aimi told them, “I will be over after school to help.” She related to her parents of the meeting that was scheduled to take place.
“Good.” Goro nodded approvingly and said, “Tell Kaldera if you see him that I may have some money for him. I believe a buyer is coming for that guitar of his.”
“I will.” The family discussed the upcoming day’s work at the shop, and the activities at Aimi’s school. “The class trip to Koga is next weekend,” she commented, “it’s all anyone’s been talking about.”
Madoka looked with sympathy at her daughter. “I’m sorry we couldn’t afford for you to go, Aimi. It would have been good for you.”
Aimi shrugged. “It’s okay,” she replied, her expression and voice sincere. “Kaz and Mei aren’t going, either. Besides,” she went on, “I have a feeling something else is going to happen that will beat going to see the Ninja Museum!”
All three laughed as a knock came on the door, which slid back a moment later. “Morning, all,” a female voice called.
The Okudas welcomed in the new arrivals, a uniformed boy and girl. “Hello, Kaz, Mei,” Aimi returned.            
“Come sit,” Goro told the pair, and the two removed their shoes and took up spaces on either side of Aimi.
“Yes, and help yourselves,” Madoka told them. She motioned to the plates on the table, “there’s plenty.”
“Oh no, thank you,” the one called Kaz returned politely. “I’m well-fed.” Kazuhiro Ogawa was tall and thin; his black hair was worn long, but not so much to become a concern for the school district’s regulations. He lived next door to Aimi, as he had all their lives.
“Don’t mind if I do,” Mei said as she helped herself to a piece of the nori and dipped it into Aimi’s bowl. Meiho Maeda was another neighbor on the street, the most outgoing of the group. Mei was thickset in her build, the product of years of martial arts training. The uniform showed off her musculature, in particular her well-defined thighs and calves.
These, however, weren’t the first things people tended to notice when they saw Mei for the first time. Her face was plain, but bore the bloodlines of Korea as well as Japan. Her hair was black, thick and very long, held in place by several bobby pins and a black plastic hair clip. Her dark eyes were accented by the black eye makeup she wore; this plus her larger than normal girth gave Mei a menacing image. “How is everyone?” She asked, taking care to swallow before speaking.
“Another day,” Goro replied and rolled his eyes to the ceiling, “another day poorer,” which again drew laughter.
“How is your mother doing, Mei?” Madoka asked. “I feel sad I’ve not been over to visit in a while.”
Mei nodded. “Mom’s better today,” she replied, “and she says hello to all of you.” Mei’s mother had been ill for some time and was no longer able to work. As a result, Mei looked after her, especially on her more difficult days.
Aimi looked to Kaz. “How are your mom and dad, by the way?” She asked.
Kaz shrugged, and the look on his face showed right away. “They were both out the door before I was up,” he replied, “the usual.” Kaz’s father was lead mechanic at an automotive repair center in the city, while his mother worked in a downtown department store. The Ogawa’s of late were rarely seen, due to their schedules.
Aimi had known that her first question had struck a nerve, and inside she wished she hadn’t asked it. Changing the subject, Aimi then asked, “How about today? Kaldera’s coming over to school, right?”
At the mention of Kaldera, Kaz became more like himself. “Yes, and Minoru’s coming by, too,” he said. “You guys will love him. He’s quite the musician.” Kaz went on to explain that Minoru went to the exclusive public school near theirs.
Seated between her friends, Aimi detected the barely perceptible growl that came from her left, from Mei. She made no reaction to it, and Aimi continued to listen to Kaz. “He’s very good on the shamisen,” Kaz explained, “and he’s been learning guitar like I have from Kaldera. Oh, and another thing: Kaldera wants to take the boat out next weekend. He wanted to know if you would be interested.”
Madoka smiled. “Well, Aimi,” she said, “you just predicted something different might happen.”
“What does Kaldera have in mind?” Goro asked, equally interested.
“I don’t know,” Kaz replied. “He just mentioned it in passing the other day. He’s also planning to play out this week. I hope he’ll let us know more about that, too.”
Aimi then turned to Mei. “What’s up with your Tae Kwon Do?” She asked. “Did you hear about the testing?”
“Yes.” Mei smiled, probably her first broad one of the day. “Matsunaga-Sensei says I’m all but ready for my test, the big one.”
All voiced congratulations. Now sixteen (the same age as her friends), Mei had risen through the junior ranks to the red belt. The aforementioned final test would come soon, and if all went well, Mei would gain the long-sought black belt. “I’ve been waiting for this a long time,” she said, “and I’m hopeful; but I’m not gonna believe it until Sensei says so.”
“Well,” Kaz said, “we’ll be there to see it.”
The group broke up, and Madoka invited the pair over for dinner that evening. A regular occurrence, as Kaz’s parents tended to work long hours, and it gave Mei a break from home.            
The three watched and waved goodbye to Aimi’s parents as they drove down the narrow street in the old white Suzuki mini truck. With the Okudas on their way, the three teenagers headed in the other direction. In addition to his book bag, Kaz also carried his acoustic guitar in its hard case.
“So we’ll finally get to meet Minoru,” Aimi said. “You’ve spoken so well of him; I am anxious to find out what he’s like.”
Mei nodded, but said nothing. Her gaze appeared fixed ahead, but as Aimi was a little shorter, she could note that her friend’s eyes were downcast. Reaching out, she put her hand into Mei’s, the other into Kaz’s.
Aimi noticed that Mei’s smile returned, and Kaz had one as well. That made hers even larger. It will be a good day. I am glad to make my two oldest friends smile. Then I can smile a little more, too.
* * *
The silver Jaguar pulled up to the curb and stopped without a sound. The rear door opened, and the tall girl alighted. Bending from the waist, she leaned into the window and thanked the driver, then stood to watch him drive away.
She turned to look over the main courtyard of Katsuhashi Academy. The fan-shaped yard which led to the main doors of the impressive brick building was populated by numerous uniformed students. Most talked in small groups; a few were seated on the grass or on benches, studying or socializing before homeroom.
The girl checked her face in a compact mirror before walking in, and noted with some satisfaction that the eyes of many of the male students and older passerby were on her lean, athletic body. She ascertained her white and blue uniform blouse was straight, the red scarf and the seams of her short dark blue skirt in line. Shouldering her book bag, she walked into the courtyard and brushed back her long, flowing black hair with careful casualness.
She looked over the knots of boys, they in the all-black uniform of the spring semester. The girl listened as well, but not to the chatter of her fellow students. She did not hear that other sound which she expected at this time of the morning
“Asuka-san! Ohayo!” The call of two girls’ voices broke Asuka from her search, and she turned to greet her classmates as they rushed up.
“Ohayo.” Homoka and Masami were two of her closest friends; like Asuka, both were in their second year of high school. The former was Asuka’s teammate in field hockey. She was short and had the classic, thin build of a Japanese girl. Her hair was long and black and styled much like that of Asuka’s. Masami was also thin, but she did not play sports. Her own straight hair hung past her shoulders, and she wore expensive eyeglasses, plus a black beret perched at the correct angle on her head.
The girls walked on either side of Asuka as they passed through the courtyard. Over the typical questions of how her friends were doing plus other matters of the school day, Asuka was paying only scant attention. She continued to search ahead of her; then near the main doors, she saw a boy sitting alone on a bench with a curious musical instrument in his hands.
“Minoru-kun,” she called as she moved quickly to his side. As she did, the boy rose, carefully set down his shamisen, bowed and smiled.
Minoru Higa was a teenager that would stand out in any crowd. He was tall, and looked even thinner than he was in the uniform. His hair was thick and naturally wavy, the ends just a little past his collar. This was actually against regulations at Katsuhashi; but then, Minoru seemed to get away with such things.
“Good morning, Asuka-chan.” Minoru accepted Asuka’s police kiss. He also hailed Homoka and Masami and bowed to them, which pleased the girls much more than a simple greeting should.
“How are you today?” Asuka looked into those dark, almost black eyes.
“I am quite well, thank you,” he quietly replied. “I’m glad I got to see you before school, Asuka. I wanted to ask you about something.”
Longtime friends, Minoru dispensed with the honorific, usually after the initial greeting. That to Asuka was just one of Minoru’s “ways,” of which there were many.
“Of course,” Asuka replied.
As on cue, Asuka’s friends made their excuses and stepped away. Minoru chuckled at this. “They are so tactful,” he joked. “You have them well trained.”
The two laughed as they sat on the bench. As Minoru placed his shamisen in a padded leather shoulder bag, Asuka replied, “They are not trained, I can assure you, Minoru. They are merely kind about giving us our space.”
“Yes, and carrying on with the Camelot-like nature of what they, and everyone else thinks our relationship is.” Setting the bag alongside his books, Minoru said, still smiling (though Asuka could tell its meaning had changed), “I gather you have heard what they’re all saying about us.”
“I care not what others say,” Asuka replied. “It is what we both think that matters.”
“Supposedly,” Minoru went on, “we are the Golden Pair. That perfect couple.” He snorted with barely hidden distaste. “I don’t know about you, Asuka, but frankly I am embarrassed by it.”
Asuka gently laid her hand on Minoru’s shoulder. “No one means anything bad by it,” she said. “Yes, I have heard that too, and it is rather juvenile. Let the others talk; it means nothing to me.”
She watched as Minoru turned slightly and looked into her eyes. They seemed sad and apologetic. “I didn’t mean to put down your friends,” he told her. “I’m sorry.”
“No, don’t think that. You are so decent to everyone,” Asuka said. “Don’t worry about them, or me. We have each other; that is what matters, isn’t that right?”
Minoru smiled. “Right,” he replied. “Oh, if I may now ask you about that certain something?”
Asuka smiled and nodded. “You may.”
“Kaldera is going to be over at Masuyo today,” Minoru explained. “I’m meeting up with my good friend Kaz over there, too. Why don’t you come with me? You know Kaldera already, and I think you’d really get along with Kaz and his friends.”
As he spoke, Minoru examined Asuka’s expression. At the mention of the name of the public school, her eyebrows raised and her face, slimmer in its lines than most Japanese, took on a slight change and the smile fell away. Minoru expected this; it was the logical, almost programmed reaction where Asuka was concerned.
“I…don’t know,” Asuka replied, but she looked away and said no more.
“Oh, do come with me, Asuka.” Minoru took her hand, and quickly added, “It is not like we would be exploring a wild world. Kaz is a fine person, and I’m quite excited to meet these friends of his. A few new friends are always a good thing, wouldn’t you say?”
Asuka turned to face him, and her smile returned. “You can talk me into anything, Minoru,” she replied. “Yes, I’ll gladly go with you. The hockey season is over, and the dinner party is not until later in the evening. By the way, you are coming, aren’t you?”
“Indeed.” The two rose, and Minoru shouldered his shamisen. “Your father has become rather a patron of my music, which I am grateful for.”
As he picked up his books with his free hand, Asuka noted the familiar leather-bound volume atop the stack. “Here I stand amid the roar…” she chided.
…of a surf-tormented shore,” Minoru returned with a grin.

The outside loudspeakers then emitted the tones for homeroom, and the two entered the building hand in hand, awash in the mass of those wearing the school’s colors.

Saturday, August 20, 2016

Music among the Art tonight!

Well, my website's blog is acting better...so...if you like click on the link to my website, and hear about how Saturday night in Mechanicsburg went!

Plus a gratuitous shot of me, along with fellow Sunbury Press Books authors Joe Harvey and former PA Lt. Gov. Mark Singel!

http://torygatesmedia.wixsite.com/home/single-post/2016/08/20/Live-Among-the-Artworks-on-a-Saturday


Monday, October 13, 2014

Motivation, Madness, the Number 20 and "Drifters"

Greetings once more, blogworld...this is the first time in a while that I have time to write something other than what I am working on, and that is partly due to the inability to get in gear at a time when I must absolutely do it.

Where have I been? Back on the road again for GeoTraffic.com -- after the layoff, I was called back in. Restructuring has gone on, and I am back in action for them. Needless to say, glad to have it, and I think we might just make a significant step in the near future. Gotta be optimistic.

Busy doing my other jobs...Radio PA part of this week, which means getting out of bed at about 1:30 in the morning. Not much different than Geo, because the morning shift for me means getting up at 3:30. And the travel, and all the other stuff.

Writing...okay, recently I hammered out after several false starts a manuscript called, "Night Dawn."

https://www.behance.net/gallery/19966397/Night-Dawn-Chapter-5-Excerpt

It is potentially a young adult novel about one person's struggle through a critical period of teenage life, rife with numerous issues...most of which I experienced myself. Long way to go before that's ready. I had to get it out of me.

20.

I am not completely sure what counts as full and finished...but I may have 20 manuscripts or books written. 

20.

I can't remember if that number includes the horrific sci-fi novel I wrote in the 90's. But...since 2007, that's what I have been doing.

20.

So...what of "Parasite Girls?"

Forgive me, but I am going to say something that needs to be said. If I had a nickel for every single person who told me they were going to buy or download my book...I'd have a very big bag of nickels.

To those who have, THANK YOU. I am appreciative and respectful that you laid your money down for me. I hope the book is worth it to you, and that you at least enjoyed it. I hope you also let others know it was good.

The past year has been a year of learning what NOT to do. I have learned quite a bit about promotion on the fly, and I am going to have to use a very different set of tactics when I get the next one out there.

And yes, the next one, "Drifters: Tales of the Southern Cross" has potential for more than one book, but that's too far down the road. 

https://www.behance.net/gallery/14840009/Drifters-Chapter-9-The-Lonely-Ocean

There is a rough cut of it. I will be editing this fall, Mitch Bentley will be working up his magic for a cover, and I aim to publish again by Amazon.com -- I am not impressed with Smashwords and its lack of action, so I may not go with them for the ebook thing.

This is more of what I write, the young adult world, a bit of fantasy, fiction, non-fiction, travel, and yes, madness. I'm good at the latter.

I am also endeavoring to get another work, "A Moment in the Sun" a read from publishers or agents. This one is young adult/adult fiction...crosses over. Friends have told me this one has something more to it. 

I have to go all out for this...this is what I enjoy doing and what I want to do. The aim has been and still is, to get some of my work out there, get that built up, and then hope by the right time, someone will notice that, "Hey, this guy has something good."

I think I do, anyway.

One thing I've noticed--you still need a big name behind you, you still need a real deal publisher or you will not get much notice. I don't care what anyone says...we all can't get a "Colbert Bump," as a colleague suggested I go for, or have some self-serving twit on TV or wherever touching themselves over you. Doesn't work.

A band can make their own records and tour...but you still have to have support behind the scenes.

I am if anything, a stubborn SOB. I don't quit, even when my better judgment says I should.

So yeah...it's a battle. But one that I approach with the idea that at the end of the day, I'm still alive. So I haven't lost.

The one thing I wish I could get is about a month or two where I didn't have to chase money and could seriously map out what I need to do, beyond the writing. So far, I think a lot about it; not much more. 

It will get done when the time is right. Anyway, I need to hit the pool, and get ready for round two of my workday.

Round 3 is at 3:30 am, or as my colleague Tim Lambert says, "Oh-Dark-30."

Check out what I got on Behance...ask me questions, I'll have answers.

Peace, Out.





Monday, March 24, 2014

"A Moment in the Sun," and Where Do We Go from Here?

Greetings, one and all...I have returned to the blogosphere after hopefully catching my breath, and figuring out just where the hell I have been the past weeks.

I have never been much for diaries, though I do still have a leather-bound journal full of multi-colored scratchings from about ten years ago. Why I keep it, I have no idea. The things you find when you are digging around in the hoard/closet.

I don't know if this is counts as spring cleaning, but I decided to drag a pair of bookshelves from my closet into my bedroom. And no, I didn't remove the books. That's just how I am.

So anyway, I then spent the better part of the past two late nights re-sorting my books, as sort of a literary "High Fidelity" scene. I don't have enough space in the room to put all my books there. So I have to figure out what I don't need/want at hand, and put those back in the closet. Weird, I know.

Interesting to see a lot of these again...I do realize though, a bunch of these are headed for one of those big metal dumpster/dropoff things. I have to do it, not much choice in the matter.

So yeah...the past few weeks have found me busy here:

http://www.geotraffic.com/

This is my new company...I am back to being a traffic reporter, and we're on a new platform with a different target. This has a future, I feel and we're taking the small steps forward to get us where we need to go. I'm back in broadcasting of a sort, what can I say?

To use a MASH reference: this is "meatball surgery." There is no finesse in this art, it is grunt work, but it is work that requires some smarts, common sense, and an ability to think on your ass...because we're sitting.

I am also back to driving long distances. I've done this before...back in the starving, struggling days of the early 90's, I drove a Dodge Lancer to its death (at least three times) when going from Watertown to Hyannis to do a $5 an hour job, because...I wanted to be broadcaster.

The dream job of 2004-09, XM saw me drive from York, PA to Washington, DC and back, five days a week or more, for all that time. Now I'm driving a similar time frame but a few less miles.

Why?

I like where I live...I know, I swore up and down I was going to get the fuck out of York and never return. Then I realized where the new job was. I didn't like that area the first time I worked there...I still don't like it.

This is better, and so it is.

Now...about this:

http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/1494401975/ref=as_li_ss_tl?ie=UTF8&camp=1789&creative=390957&creativeASIN=1494401975&linkCode=as2&tag=coverscroll-20

I know, I have to shamelessly plug. I am writing this just after making a sale to a friend of mine of "Parasite Girls." Sales are slloooooowwww...how it is. Also, had a long Facebook chat with a dear friend who told me what was "wrong" culturally with the book. And of course, she was right.

I do not think any of these things are terrible errors, but I understand them. I did my best to get it right...it's kind of like this: when I edited and edited, and did everything I thought I could possibly do to get it right, I finally had to say, "Enough!"

You can only do so much. I think it turned out well and I'm happy with it.

Here then, comes my dilemma: what do I do next?

Ihttp://www.wattpad.com/39695970-a-moment-in-the-sun

This is the first chapter (rough cut) of "A Moment in the Sun." Wattpad is a social media/writing site that is new to me, and I'm trying it out as a means to get some new audience in the mix.

You can also read this, and much more at www.behance.net/torygates

Anyway..."A Moment in the Sun" was written at the beginning of this year. It came quickly; this could be the step up I need.

Here's the deal..."Parasite Girls" became the test case for my writing. It is straight fiction; "Moment..." is fiction, but as the main characters are all teenagers, it can be considered a crossover to Young Adult, which is what I mostly write.

Half-step, maybe?

The story is fully set in Japan, and again I touch on a phenomena which is not unique to that part of the world, this time. Here is the story that inspired it:

http://www.bbc.com/news/magazine-23182523

Now in this story is referenced a manga, "Welcome to the NHK." I got the first volume, and I was not terribly impressed by it. The storyline was too typical, and did not touch enough on why the main character was hikikomori. Didn't explain it well.

I had a couple of ideas on what to do with this, but then "Moment..." made its way into my brain and would not leave.

A close friend of mine read the first chapter aloud from my Behance site...her husband said that sounded good.

Hmmm...

Not long ago, I described the story aloud to another friend. She was busy clearing her desk and doing that kind of work, but her ears pricked up. She said, "That's the one."

I wonder...it is a specific story, a few more characters than "Parasite Girls," but easy enough to follow. 

I think this is the best step up. Then, following this I can again do a full-blooded YA story, which likely will be "The Drifters."

What is happening here is that I feel in a hurry. I feel like I have got to get these out, but I cannot throw money into the creation of a project, then jump to the next. It just does not work.

I am promoting "Parasite Girls," and once I get off weekends, then I can really do that. Each of these projects is time-consuming. I have talked about how "PG" took a full year to realize. Yes, it did. I'd already written it; but then what followed was every single thing you need to do to make it real.

I am also again trying to find a publisher/agent...it's worth trying now, because I have a book in hand. Here's the next one, and the next one, and the next one...better risk I'd say.

Staying the course, being patient, keeping myself somewhat together. Yeah, I have to do it. There's no time for worrying, I have to just keep on doing all these things.

The shit ain't over yet.

Saturday, November 2, 2013

"The Stranger" -- That Would Be Me

I am sitting in the cafe of a place that is not my usual one; I finally crawled from the wreckage of a 22-hour workday, and am not in a celebratory mood.

I turned 48 yesterday, which is kind of a strange number. Forgive me, but I don't feel old anymore, not at all. I am not in the shape I once was when I leapt into audiences during my days in a certain theatre production, but at least I still have some ability to get about. Mentally, my capacity is not what it once was, but I can still think reasonably quickly.

We are at a very exciting period in my potential rest of my life--without naming names or going into details, I had a pair of job interviews that went well in recent days. I feel very positive one or the other might just be the one, and some stability of a sort can return.

I am not one to worry about this, because I don't need to. I have enough else to worry about!

As soon as next week (I hope), my first book, "Parasite Girls" will be ready for release. It is pretty much now--the manuscript is done for the final time, Mitch Bentley's cover is brilliant in its color and capture of a certain character's creative mania, and I've got most of the details done.

We just need to connect dots, threads and related stuff, and I will be a published author.

Don't congratulate me yet--I need to get this last part accomplished. Then I can feel better about it.

Navigating the world of the ebook, cyberspace and a digital realm I know little about is daunting. I have to plug, shamelessly and I have to figure out how I'm going to make this work stand out.

First plug: http://www.behance.net/torygates

Go there, and you'll find draft cuts of "Parasite Girls," plus potential follow-up work I'm at right now. You'll see everything else about my mad "careers."

I honestly think without arrogance that I have written a good story. I didn't have the space I wished I had to dig deeper into some of the self-destructive tendencies of a couple of the characters. There's what I could do with what space and time I had, and the flow is crucial.

My style has changed, and that's why a lot of things have not been released. My method is not the same, either. I am also of the belief that eventually I have to tackle the most difficult assignment of my writing life...me.

I for some reason keep putting off getting things that I want to read, probably because I'm afraid of being too unduly influenced. I can be. My walk through this place spits horrendous things at me, and they leap out, leer and snarl at me with tentacles that have only evil going on.

How hard it is for me to look at the shelves without thinking, and this is not exactly kind:

"I WRITE BETTER THAN 95% OF THIS SHIT!"

Really...50 Shades of (fill in the blank with your favorite color). How many knockoff versions of that are there?

Books with titles that play on other titles, and not in a satirical or humorous way? Examinations and re-examinations classic works, that are in my mind meant to trade off the name without actually doing anything?

Now, I will admit that a parody work of "Downton Abbey" is going to be damned funny, I bet. "Downtrodden Abbey," written in what reminds me of the Harvard Lampoon's trashing of Tolkien, with "Bored of the Rings."

Cleverness and a nasty little jab here and there doesn't bother me. Ripping off someone with your own version of something that makes fan fiction look brilliant in comparison, well, bleah.

Am I arrogant and egomaniacal enough to think "Parasite Girls" stacks up well against anything out there? I think it is a good story--a smooth read, only a few major characters, and a touching upon issues and concerns that are real. Things that happen in society that are real, whether you want to admit it or not.

Not the heaviest thing I ever did, and not in the Young Adult genre I normally do, but it is a start and I think a good one.  

An excerpt:

http://www.behance.net/gallery/Parasite-Girls-Excerpt-2/10641913

Rough cut, this scene has been re-written. The lyrics to "Blade" are my own.

https://www.smashwords.com/profile/view/torygates

Oh, look it's me--well, not the best thing to look at, but I can live with that for now. Its not a bad profile, and the picture is not that old. 

Around the time of my birthday, just missed Samhain I did I tend to get introspective. I think about the past year, what I am trying to do, where my direction is headed, and all that shit.

Sorry, I just don't feel the need to say, "Oh, never mind--is NASCAR/Oprah/SOMEFUCKINGHIDEOUSREALITYSHOW on yet?" 

Or, "Oh, never mind--let's go shopping."

THIS is as close to shopping as I ever get. I have on my table before me a strange manga by Nico Tanigawa. Part research material, part a look at me back in the past...I shudder to think that I might just have been that girl on the cover. That introverted, that messed up...ei.

The other is Albert Camus' "The Stranger." The BBC marked Camus' coming 100th birthday early this morning with a partial reading. I had to get this.

Yes, I'm easily fucking led, I know.

But the narrative is darkly brilliant, isn't it? If you have read "The Stranger" or any of his stuff, there is a method and a way that few can catch up with. 

And here is the key: Camus PUTS YOU IN HIS SHOES. YOU SIT IN HIS CHAIR. YOU ARE HIM, AS HE TELLS HIS STORY.

Perfect, without it seems hardly trying.

"The Stranger" has a central point, a Frenchman who for no real reason guns down an Arab on a deserted beach. The Cure did a song called "Killing an Arab," which I believe was about this story.

I am not arrogant about being my own Stranger. I must be that odd character other people see, that one who sits alone and writes, stares at his computer, reads, drinks a lot of coffee. I don't personally care whether people wonder about me or not; I would not turn you away, unless you either come onto me with a need to meet Jesus, or start talking shit about things like I'm your friend...and we've never met.

I did make a pitch just now for "Parasite Girls" to a young lady at the table next to me. I think she was just being polite, but did say she'd look at the Behance page. 

That's the kind of thing I have to do. I have to engage people, and I'm not good at it. I need to not be afraid to sell the idea, without selling my soul. 

But I have a story to tell, and I must tell it. I must tell all the other crazy stories you see on the Behance page, and ever more that I must rewrite, edit, fix and make real.

I got quite a job ahead of me. A real job (haha) might get in the way, but that's not what it's about. 

I am still driven, at 48 to work in broadcasting, to write, to make music, to create. I have to do it--not for money, fame, etc. I do it because I want to.

Now...I am NOT one of these people who is going to remain inside a box and decry the materialistic whatever that drives other people. Should I become a person of means once more, I will make absolutely no fucking apologies for it, thank you very much.

If not, at least I fucking did it.

Ei...I must now actually read some of this, and find out if the Stranger and I have anything else we can talk about. Better than this, I'd say.

Peace, Out.